RETURN OF GO COMPARE SINGER LEADS TO UPTURN IN REPOSSESSIONS
“I want to smash his face in” says Dave from Pontypridd
After their disastrous trial with taking a bus full of tourists to a magical land that offered the best credit card deals and insurance rates, Go Compare recently reintroduced their rotund opera singer as the war with the Meerkats to be the most likely to burn in hell for eternity is ramped up.
But a report suggests the return of opera singer ‘Gio Compario’ has led to an upturn in repossessions as more and more hard-up Brits have turned to him for financial advice over the last few months.
"I found myself badly in debt, to the point where I didn't like to answer the phone in case it was someone chasing money from me,” admits Dave Bumcleft from Pontypridd.
“Then I saw that the annoying opera singer from Go Compare was back on the telly promising to provide the best personal loan rates on the market. I couldn’t resist. I thought he was a cuddly caricature who sings stupid and annoying songs, he's bound to have a strong grasp of fiscal strategies, so I jumped online.”
“Fast forward 10 months and I've had my house repossessed, my wife has left me and I'm living in a hostel. I want to smash his f&*king face in.”