“WE’RE ASTOUNDED THAT FOX WHO ATE OUR CHICKENS ATE THE NEW CHICKENS WE LEFT HIM IN CHARGE OF” SAY FOOTBALL ASSOCIATION
He’s not Mother Theresa admits spokesman
The FA were left astounded yesterday as they were forced to get rid of Sam Allardyce for pretty much the very thing they'd spent much of the last ten years investigating him over.
"We can't believe it,” admitted one insider "We never expected this. It's easy to say we should have been forewarned by our own investigative team but then this job is easy with the benefit of hindsight.”
“I know you could argue that we had the benefit of hindsight when we appointed him but that’s not the point.”
“Big Sam feels very let down by this disgusting process of entrapment. These people know no depths.”
“They offered him a huge sum of money just to sidestep a few well intentioned laws governing our national sport which would simultaneously drag its reputation through the mud and severely undermine the authority of his employers. He’s not Mother Theresa you know.”