HESTON BLUMENTHAL SERVES CRISPY PANCAKE ON BIRDSEYE WAFFLE WITH PEAS IN 3 STAR MICHELIN RESTAURANT
“I don’t know how I think of them” says 50 year old slaphead
HESTON BLUMENTHAL HAS ONCE AGAIN pushed back the frontiers of food creation with his latest taste sensation, a Findus crispy pancake served on a bed of Birdseye potato waffle with petit pois.
“I don’t know how I think of them,” says the 50 year old slaphead. “I’ve properly crossed the streams here with my multi-sensory Findus and Birdseye hybrid. And I’ve brought them firmly into the 21st century with a serving of peas.”
“People think this shit is easy, well it’s not I can tell you. I was in my lab kitchen for nearly four months coming up with this bad boy.”
“Most of that time was spent perfecting the cooking of the pancake because as we know they have a finite window of maybe 3 seconds when they’re cooked somewhere between frozen or raw and charred to a crisp.”
“If you think this is good wait til you see what I’ve got planned for my Faggots.”
Posh food critic Giles Coren is less impressed though.
“Trust that pretentious bastard to go overboard with it. He thinks he’s too good to serve baked beans with that well he’s f&*$ing not I can tell you. You having that pickled quale’s egg?”