EU KEEPY-UPPY QUOTAS STOPPED GOVE FROM BEATING JOHN BARNES
He responds by comparing experts to Nazis
Michael Gove’s crass analogies were ramped up today as he responded to being dressed down by John Barnes. Gove compared warning about the dangers of the EU to Nazis dismissing the views of Einstein.
“We love an analogy at the Brexit office,” said one campaign worker, “For instance, Michael Gove’s appearance is that of a 1970’s science teacher who now signs the sex offenders register. Do you want any more? We’ve got loads.”
Gove’s Nazi slur follows yesterday’s audition for a future career as England football manager after publically naming wrong players. After being incorrectly named as a Brexit supporter, former Liverpool and England star John Barnes appeared on Sky to declare his support for the Remain campaign, as one onlooker noted:
“This is John Barnes' greatest public intervention since he rapped on World in Motion. They should have listened, the only way to beat John Barnes is to get round the back, because he's the master plan.”
A spokesperson from the Brexit side responded, “Michael didn't mean John Barnes actually, we meant that other one, Sol Campbell.”
And after being slapped down by an articulate and impassioned riposte from Barnes, Gove's camp moved to discredit the 79 cap international.
"He was shit for 90% of the time in an England shirt, Take that goal in Rio away and what have you got? Michael Gove could have beaten him at keepy uppies if the EU keepy uppy quotas hadn't stopped him from practicing in the 1980's."