BENITEZ COULD STAY AT TOON
Lee Charnley unveils plan to keep Rafa
Newcastle United have moved quickly in response to their relegation from the Premier League last night by planning to tie down Rafa Benitez for next season.
A spokesman for the Toon said, “Our head of recruitment has sourced effective materials from the continent which we feel will be enough to keep Rafa at St James’.”
“We’ve invested several million pounds in some of the highest quality hardware material which we’re confident will be enough to tie down Benitez for another year at least.”
When pressed on whether Newcastle’s plans involved literally tying Benitez down to keep him at the club, Charnley’s spokesman was quick to point out their four part plan was much more sophisticated.
“We’ve brought in a car clamp too,” he added, “and the lads are on standby to bundle his wife into the back of a car.”